Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Where/When the hell am I?

Its like when you are exhausted and sleeping in a strange bed.  You wake up and have a moment of  "Where the hell am I?!?"
Only it happens when you are awake.
And it is freaking weird.
Seriously, I just had a momentary freak out as I looked around my work place and for a nanosecond had no freaking clue where I was. My stomach lurched, I started to panic, and I looked around trying to find some clue until my brain finally was like  "...wait... ok..got this.  Sorry, boss."
Last week, after a grueling mental thought session (SHUT UP! THINKING HARD! BURNS CALORIES!), I was driving around town and part of my brain SWORE I was in Mississippi, not in Texas.  It was like my eyes were taking in Texas, part of my brain was navigating around Texas, and the other part of my brain was like "Isn't Mississippi wonderful?  I am so happy to be here! I love this town". But... I know that the place it was remembering is not the same today as it was 4+ years ago when I lived there. And when my fiancee tried to explain where this alcoholic slushee place was I was trying to figure out where the road was and I couldn't because Mississippi and Texas don't coexist on a map!... so I had to sit and convince that part of my brain that it was freaking lost in time and space.
Not a pleasant discussion to have with yourself. (also, probably indicative that alcoholic slushees are a bad idea, at least for the immediate time being)
Apparently though, it does happen.  I have a friend who, occasionally, swears she gets lost in time.  She doesn't know WHEN she is. We joke and just say she is a woman ahead of her time.  But, honestly, it is a creepy feeling to know exactly where you are.... but not sure about when you are.
Its not quite the dissassociative disorder thing.  You are still a part of your body, and capable of interacting with things.  You just feel like the guy from Quantum Leap, only you are not used to that shit so it is really freaky.   
At least de ja vu is cool.  This is just plain freaky.
Though if I could Quantum Leap out of grad school that would be AWESOME!

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